My dearest Liam,
You've been a year old for almost a week now. It's hard to believe it's been a year already.
The day you were born was one of the best and scariest of my life. I knew something was wrong the minute they took you to the baby warmer. I could feel that something was not right. Not being able to hold was devastating. Hearing you were being sent to a NICU 2 hours away was ever worse. Watching them take you away, looking so very tiny on a huge stretcher was one of the worst moments of my life.
The week we spent in the NICU was the most challenging I've ever been through. Watching you struggle to breath, hearing all the sounds you shouldn't have been making, being told when I could and couldn't hold you. It was horrible.
But you, my beautiful boy, are a fighter.
We brought you home from the NICU on September 30th. When I walked through the front door, into the arms of your very excited big brothers, it was like a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulder. I was finally able to cry over everything we'd been through. I walked through that NICU week in a fog and coming home was such a joy. We'd survived. You'd survived.
I still think about your birth all the time. I have yet to write down you entire birth story because it's still difficult. I was so terrified I was going to lose you. I still have all the pictures on my phone. I still look at them often and marvel at how far you've come.
And you've come so very far!
Your a 22 pound ball of trouble! You're walking more and more every day. You babble like we understand exactly what your saying. But you do talk real words too. You can say "Mom, Maw, Nom (for Aunt Amanda), Da, Aiden, Grady, kitty, dog, bye, I get it, where go? what happen? I don't know?" and a few others.
You follow your brothers everywhere, especially Grady! You love that he plays with you and when they are doing things that you can't, you are not happy! You love cars and trucks and push them around saying "Vroom".
You adore your MAW and often try to crawl to her house when we're outside. You know where you get spoiled....
You are a HORRIBLE sleeper!! Horrible! And I'm often at my wits end with you at night. You won't go to sleep without being rocked. You never stay asleep. You're always awake in the middle of the night and fight me so badly about going back to sleep, you often end up just sleeping with me so I am able to get some sleep. I think you don't like being alone. If I'm standing in your room, you sleep fine. It's when I leave, you freak! And when you're sleeping with me? No problem at all. I often wonder if your hatred for sleeping alone goes back to your days in the NICU.
At one year old you are 22 lbs and 11 oz, which is 51% and 29 inches, the 28%. You have 9 teeth but one (or is it two?) is fused together, creating a conjoined tooth. Only 1 in 1,000 kids have this happen. When your older you will have to get x-rays to find out if you have one adult tooth or two under that conjoined tooth. In the mean time, it gives you a wicked cute smile!
Oh Liam, it has been one roller coaster of a year! There has been so many, wonderful ups that they outnumber the downs we have fought together. I am so grateful to be your Mother. I can't wait to see what the next year brings and all the many years to come. You're going to be great baby boy.
I love you so much!
~Mommy~
